"It's a Business" from "Curtains"

CARMEN
I've never been known as one of those stupid clucks, Elaine.

BAMBI
Bambi.

CARMEN
Who pisses away a lot of her hard earned bucks, Elaine.

BAMBI
Bambi!

CARMEN
But facing the fact your coloratura sucks, Bambi!

Though it breaks your mother's heart,
Forget about the part.
It's time for you to know
Why I really backed this show.

You asked me for my motives
Well, you needn't be so smart.
It's a bus'ness.

It isn't making history
It isn't making art,
It's a bus'ness.

Shaw and Ibsen,
Take 'em away.
And don't bother me with Molière,
Those Russian's never pay.

So, go on, criticize me,
Please proceed with your attack,
It's a bus'ness.

I put one million in
And I expect two million back.
It's a bus'ness.

So what crime have I committed?
If I'm putting up a fight.
It's a bus'ness.

And I want thosse paying suckers out there
Giving me the bus'ness ev'ry night!

The not-for-profit theaters don't need to turn a buck,
That's not bus'ness.

STAGEHANDS
That's not bus'ness!

CARMEN
So, give them "Lysistrata"
And I wish them lots of luck.
I do bus'ness!

STAGEHANDS
She does bus'ness!

CARMEN
Gorky, Shmorky.
Money misspent.
You won't survive Yom Kippur
You'll never get through Lent.

I once knew a producer
Whose pretention knew no bounds
In the bus'ness.

STAGEHANDS
In the bus'ness!

CARMEN
He mounted Samuel Beckett,
I don't mean it like it sounds,
It was bus'ness

STAGEHANDS
It was bus'ness!

CARMEN
So now he's down the crapper
While I'm working in my prime.
It's a bus'ness.

STAGEHANDS
It's a bus'ness.

CARMEN
And the shows I do do bus'ness,
'Cuz I really know my bus'ness,
And I'm giving them the bus'ness, honey
All the time!

To stagehands, to the dressers
To musicians in the pit,
It's a bus'ness!

STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
It's a bus'ness!

CARMEN
The owner of there premises
Cleans up if we're a hit,
He's in bus'ness!

STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
He's in bus'ness!

CARMEN
Union members
Don't work for free
Hey, Harry, on the potlight,
Blink twice if you agree.
See?

I'm not devoid of culture
But my feet are on the floor
It's a bus'ness!

STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
It's a bus'ness!

CARMEN
I'd do "The Kamasutra"
With a Richard Rogers score.
That's good bus'ness!

STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
That's good bus'ness!

CARMEN
Yes, green's my favorite color
And I don't mean on the grass,
It's a bus'ness!

STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
It's a bus'ness.

CARMEN
And the shows I do do bus'ness
Yes, I'm good at doing bus'ness
And if you don't like my bus'ness, sweetie,
Blow it out your . . .

CARMEN, STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
Bus'ness!

STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
It's a bus'ness!

CARMEN, STAGEHANDS, OSCAR, JOHNNY
It's a bus'ness!